Why I decided to fall in love with being bored at home

Well, we’re back in lockdown again.For the third time. Gyms closed. Shops closed. Restaurants closed. Now, we’re all stuck being bored at home again. It seems like a never-ending nightmare at this point.

However, while I was sat on my couch as the days blurred together, I had a thought. Why do we associate boredom with negativity? Surely, it can’t be all bad. There must be some positive side to it, so I went on a research hunt. What I found truly changed my life. I’ve now set a goal for the new year. To fall in love with being bored.

how to fall in love with being bored at home.

Table of Contents

Why people fear bored at home?

It sounds counter-intuitive but to understand the fear of boredom, we must first look at the opposite end. Being busy. It’s no surprise that millions of us live extremely busy lives. I believe that by keeping busy all the time, we may be limiting our personal growth. Let me explain why.

The need to be busy

We live in a very stimulated society. There is always something to do. Someplace to go. Some person to see. We’re always busy. Whether this is a good or bad thing has been heavily debated. A lot of people base their identity on the fact that they’re a ‘busy’ person. Always working. Constantly moving from task to task. Even in this current climate, these people are never bored at home. They always have something to do. You would think these people would be unaffected by a lockdown. Personally, I believe the opposite to be true.

Being busy doesn’t necessarily mean being productive. Ever see those people studying in the library for hours on end? Working 15-hour days back-to-back? You must think that they’re super productive people but let me challenge this thought. The human brain is a funny thing. It’s a super-efficient machine but it’s also extremely lazy.

Studies have shown that the attention span of healthy teenagers and adults is between 10-20 minutes. After that, your brain loses productive power unless you switch to another task. Refocusing your attention to your original task then resets your attention span. Therefore, it’s always recommended to take breaks whenever working or studying.

The Teaching of Psychology: Essays in Honor of Wilbert J. McKeachie and … – Wilbert James McKeachie, Charles L. Brewer – Google Books

So, being busy doesn’t always equate to productivity. Then why do we have a culture of busyness in society today? One potential answer is that by keeping busy, we can successfully avoid dealing with our inner issues. We can repress these feelings very easily. Who has time to think about emotional traumas when you have a million things to do? When we’re bored at home and we have more free time. These feelings tend to creep in very easily. Later in this post, I’ll be talking about why you should embrace this experience but for now, let’s go one more layer down. Why do we fear our own inner-selves?

The fear of self-reflection

Now, you may be thinking, this is not a real thing. However, let me challenge you once again. When was the last time you went looking inside yourself for answers? Have you dealt with every lingering emotional trauma from your childhood, from past relationships? It’s easy to say that we forget about these life-changing events, but we never truly do. They’re always there. Lurking deep inside like an infection.

Self-reflection can be a truly uncomfortable experience. It means confronting your own ego and accepting that you have flaws. The perfect persona that you’ve been showing to the world can be shattered in seconds. I’m not surprised that people would take the easier alternative. Most people would rather keep up the mask that they show to the world, as they believe it takes less work. But this isn’t true. As someone who wore his mask for a long time, I can tell you that it’s absolutely exhausting.

In my own experience, I avoided self-reflection after the end of a relationship. I didn’t want to face the truth that it wasn’t all her fault. There were behaviours that were toxic. My behaviours. I didn’t need to be jealous in this situation. My anger was unwarranted in that situation. It was terrifying to see that I had many flaws. So I understand why people don’t want to self-reflect. It was soul crushing. However, it’s the first step in becoming a better person.

Now, let’s look at what happens when you start to embrace the boredom.

The good in being bored at home

Now, we’ve chosen a different path. No more avoiding. Well, I’m here to tell you that there are two huge positives to this choice.

The space to evaluate your life

Being bored at home isn’t a bad thing. We’ve established that. But it will be a difficult and uncomfortable experience. As I mentioned earlier, the reason we avoided boredom is to prevent us from looking inward. By embracing and falling in love with it, we’ll be going headfirst into ourselves. Facing off with our inner demons.

Ever laid in bed on a Saturday night, bored out of your mind? Chances are that in this moment, you’re most likely going to evaluate your life. Your relationship. Job-status. Happiness. If there is anything that is unsatisfactory in these areas, your brain will surely focus on these areas and bring it up. Most people think of this as a downside of being bored but this is actually a good thing.

Life is too short to be unhappy. If you’re stuck in certain areas of your life, you can make a change. So many people believe that their life has to be a certain way because of pressures from family, friends, spouses, but this isn’t true. You have the power to change things whenever you want. You just need 2 things. The knowledge of what needs to change and the will to change things. If you need help setting a goal in the coming year. Please check out my FREE goal statement guide

Link https://mailchi.mp/9617f4f37e40/free-goal-setting-statement

Being bored at home allows you to do this. It gives you the mental space to decide whether your partner is right for you. Whether the job you’re giving hours of your life for is worth it. These are tough conversations that you will need to have with yourself. However, it’s a very honest way to be kind to yourself. Embrace the boredom, see what comes up that makes you uncomfortable about your life, work towards making a change in that area. That’s how you have a successful and meaningful life. By constantly making adjustments, you’ll be one step closer to becoming the most fulfilled version of yourself.

5 Brutally Honest Ways To Be Kind To Yourself – The Beauty In Being Insignificant

How To Find Your Passion In Life – The Beauty In Being Insignificant

Creativity

There has been a lot of talk about the link between creativity and boredom in the research world. A study from the University of Central Lancashire was determined to find out the evolutionary function of boredom. Some pretty exciting stuff.

They decided to run an experiment with one central task and two focus groups. The overall task was to make a list of possible uses for two paper cups. Before the task, the first focus group had to copy some numbers out of a phone book. A boring task but still with some mental stimulation as they had a goal.

The second group had to simply read the phone book for a period of time. They didn’t have to memorize anything. Just browse the phonebook without any sort of goal. An even more boring task. What they found was pretty interesting. The group that had a more boring task was significantly more likely to come up with more creative ways to use the paper cups. They came up with ideas such as turning the cups into instruments, jewellery, etc. Whilst the first group brought up less inventive ideas like using the cups as holders.

They suggested that by allowing the brain to fall into boredom. We are shifting from the conscious into the unconscious mind, where creativity seems to reside. If you want some more information about the relationship between the unconscious and creativity, check out this article.

Creativity: The role of unconscious processes in idea generation and idea selection – ScienceDirect

It got me thinking. There have been numerous times where my most creative ideas came to me when I was doing mundane tasks. In fact, the idea for this blog appeared as I was brushing my teeth. I’ve had wonderful and creative thoughts as I showered in the morning. It weirdly makes a lot of sense.

The Importance of Being… Bored – IEEE Journals & Magazine

Being bored at work can make us more creative — ScienceDaily

How to be bored at home the right way?

I believe that most people when they start trying to embrace boredom, run towards yoga and meditation techniques. Whilst these are good relaxation techniques, it’s not right for what we’re trying to achieve. To reach true boredom, we need to truly let our minds wander.

Personally, I started going for walks without my phone. For years, it has been a source of distraction and stimulation for me. Even though I’m listening to a podcast or music to relax, I’m still engaging in a task. My mind was focused on the words being spoken; the song being played. So, I decided to leave it behind.

Now, when I head out. I don’t have a goal or a destination. I take on an adventurer’s mindset. Wherever I end up, I end up. I live in a major city so it’s not hard to backtrack my steps. By doing this, I simply allow my mind to wander. Whatever thoughts arise during this experience, I take note. I don’t dwell on it for long, but I acknowledge its existence.

I have been able to notice so many new things about myself. Things I like. Behaviours I want to change. This is how I fell in love with being bored at home. It has given me the chance to transform my life.

How about you? Have you been avoiding boredom during this quarantine period? How long do you spend on your phone? Let me know in the comments below. Make sure to sign up for the mailing list to get the new FREE Goal Statement PDF. It gave me the clarity, focus needed to buckle down and start working towards embracing the boredom that comes with being stuck at home.

https://mailchi.mp/9617f4f37e40/free-goal-setting-statement

Happy holidays!

Why I decided to fall in love with being bored at home